Journal Entry- How I met your mother.

If you haven't been following the whole blog I need to take a second to mention that my main purpose to creating this is to document all the things I really believe in and key events of my life as a point of reference for my kids in case a time comes when I am not here when they need the advice. I also want them to be able to relive some of the defining times in my life that I believe helped make me who I am today. I recently had someone ask me if they were intruding by following along. To this I just want to say that if you find any value in what I have put down then it makes it just that much worth while and comments are always welcome.

Now on with how I met your mother and why she is the perfect person for me.

I still remember our first real conversation like it was yesterday. We were working in a call center at the time and I had worked my way into a role as a verifier. Basically I would run around and confirm that the customer really wanted to buy what was being sold. Now you need to know that good old dad was never what you would call a ladies man. Looking back now I can see where there was plenty of interest thrown my way but I was so shy that I rarely recognized it and even if I did I certainly wouldn't have acted on it.

However my new found position of "authority" gave me some confidence and forced interaction with the always intimidating and terrifying female gender. It is important to note at this stage I felt that your mom was completely out of my league and always got nervous and felt very awkward every time I was around her. After several months in my new position I had generated some interest and had a few girls that were interested in me and started dating a couple of them.

As it turns out the two girls I dated most frequently knew each other a bit and both of them knew your mom. Pay close attention to the next few paragraphs as they detail some very risky decisions and ultimately how I hurt some people without intending to.

Things were going fine with my dating life and I was starting to feel better about my prospects of finding love and having some great relationships. As I started getting more comfortable with myself and gained some confidence that some women would be interested in my I began finding reasons to talk to your mom. (Side Note- Every time I talked to her my heart raced and I had trouble thinking straight.) Over time we would eat lunch together in a group of our friends until one day at lunch I got the guts up to ask if she wanted to go to a party at my brothers house that night...sweaty palms, heart frozen, can't breath, want to die...wholly crap did she really just say yes.

So here is where the full difficulty of my situation comes into play. Remember that your mom knew the other two girls I was dating at the time and they knew each other. Unfortunately I still hadn't connected all the dots yet and was now dating 3 girls at the same time who while not always the tightest of friends knew each other pretty well all along not knowing I was doing so. To add to this complicated situation I found out while planning the night together that a year or two back she had actually been a pretty serious girlfriend of one of the guys who had hung out with our group before I joined in. In fact she knew my brother and the rest of my friends pretty darn good too.

So quick recap, I now have a date with a girl who knows the two other girls I am dating and is the ex-girlfriend of a guy that I now see pretty often but wouldn't exactly call a friend and who already knows the people I hang out with and I have of course no clue. Yikes, I was going to have to be quick on my feet if I had any hopes of this going anywhere.

I forgot to mention that I had already put our date plans at risk while still at the lunch where I asked her out. When I realized that she used to hang out with the group I was now friends with we spent some time talking about all the guys. As we worked our way through each one we eventually reached her ex-boyfriend. I told her I didn't know him real well but he had some crazy stories about and ex-girlfriend he had and I told her a couple laughing as I did. when I finished the last story I asked her if she knew this psycho girl back when she knew the guys...why is she looking at me like that...why isn't she answering me...oh no! As the realization sunk in that she was the "psycho" girl I had just been talking about my heart dropped through the floor. Here I am this big dumb idiot who just ruined his shot with his dream girl before it even got started. After what seemed like forever she laughed a little and said things didn't happen exactly how I had told them and asked if I still wanted to take the psycho girl out that night. Heck yeah I did and we made our plans to meet up later that night.

The party went well and we started seeing each other pretty regularly after that. For me things were going great I was dating 3 girls had a job I was happy with and had a great group of friends to boot. The problem with situations like this is that sooner or later the universe is going to strike back at you and the worst is bound to happen. For me the worst started out very innocently. Your mom told me a girl she knew was having a party and asked if we could stop by, sure I said why not.

Little did I know that each step I took towards that house was a step closer to the most uncomfortable situation I could ever have imagined. You may have guessed by now that as I walked into the party holding your moms hand the first people we bumped into were the other two girls I was dating. I actually felt like my brain began vibrating inside my head from the initial shock of the situation and the crazy scramble of the options and possible outcomes for my next move. Before I could say a word one girl ran to the bathroom crying and the other walked straight up to us and said she didn't care but the other one really liked me and I had probably broken her heart.

I thought how could I have broken her heart we were just hanging out and I had never even mentioned that we should go exclusive or anything. An important lesson here is that men and women look at relationships very differently and to build a happy life its important to take the time to learn and appreciate these differences.

So decision time was forced on me and I didn't need to think about it at all. I had only been dating your mom for a few weeks but already knew that she was the woman I wanted to share my life and build a family with.

We ended up dating on and off for a couple of years until my initial feelings were confirmed and the girl of my dreams became my wife.

I think it's important for you to know why I love your mother so much and the things that make me know I will love her forever.

• Something about the way she looks at me makes me feel like I can conquer the world. A smile from your mother fills me with more confidence and determination to take care of her than anything else in the world.

• She has a heart and cares about people and things with an intensity that I cannot even begin to match. Her heart is so big and she loves so fully that you can't help but be drawn in by her.

• Watching her be a mom makes me love her more and more every day. She dedicates so much of her time and energy to making sure that you all have what you need in life. She has endless energy in caring for our family and seems to always know what we need even before we do.

• Her big brown eyes that captivate me and make me ache to know exactly what she is thinking.

• The way she constantly encourages all of us to take risks and grow in who we are. She confidently marches into new situations confident in her ability to thrive in any environment.

• The way she loves the Aitkens like they are her natural family.
• Her generosity with time and money, she always is looking for ways she can help
• She laughs at my stupid jokes.
• Her hand fits perfectly in mine.
• She stood by me when I was out of work and trying to find direction in my life.
• She stands her ground when she knows what is right.
• She forgives me when I am silly and insensitive.
• She tells me the same old stories over and over and over again.
• She really means it when she says I Love You.
• She cares about my health and wants to keep me around.
• Her skin is so soft and smooth.
• She actually likes to talk with me and will listen to my "Hero" stories.
• She is a girly-girl.
• Her hair always smells good.
• She makes me feel invincible.
• She misses me when I am gone.
• She tolerates my addiction to email.
• She is supportive of my career.
• She loves being a wife and mother.
• I love the freckles on her shoulder and the fact that I remember the camping trip that caused them.
  
• That she likes to collect scrap booking supplies more than scrap booking.
  
• She speaks about her grandparents all the time and tells our kids how much she still loves them.
• She turns on the light for my parents when she knows they are out late.
  
• She is passionate.
• Her laugh and smile.
• The fact that she has actually been stabbed. (It's okay it was in the leg and a long time ago.)

This list could go on and on but I want to sum it up with one last reason and that is because as time goes by I keep discovering more reasons why I love her and cannot imagine a life without her by my side.

I love you Candice,

Dave